A few Simple Tips for survival

It's a jungle out there and we can't all be like Bear Grylls so here are a few realistic survival tips that don't include drinking deer blood.

1. NEVER let a blonde lead the blind

2. when texting the guy you like about popcorn NEVER under any circumstances refer to it as poop corn.

3. Always be alone on Valentines Day (your boyfriend will end up taking you to a really fancy restaurant to surprise you, and... you end up wearing a T-shirt)

4. Never eat the cookie icecream before dinner under ANY circumstance.. it will spoil it.

5. When in an awkward position with a guy you're not interested in GET OUT NOW don't be stay to be polite.

6. Have a squishie a day for breakfast

7. NEVER eat a whole chilli regardless of how much money you are offered

8. Make sure you put enough money in the dryer so all your clothes dry (Wet jeans don't slide on easy)

9. NEVER sew up crotch holes in your jeans whilst wearing them (you may sew the jean legs together or puncture your thighs)

10. NEVER laugh at an inappropriate time

11. Try really hard to NOT call your teacher mum

12. NEVER poop at a party.. no matter how bad you need to go

13. NEVER squeeze the juice container in hope it will come out faster... It will take up more time as most of it will end up on the floor

14. NEVER stand alone and sway when you’re at a bar... you’ll get kicked out   

15. NEVER leave a candle burning when you leave your room for a long period of time... you’ll return to the house of wax